CAA Running Tally II

If a video game system is produced but nobody buys it, does it actually exist? (PS: Google it, D.C.!)

Hey! The sequel to Running Tally took just 10 days! So you can apparently count on Running Tally III—in which I get my ass kicked by Mr. T, or in which Sofia Coppola makes a horribly panned appearance, or in which a franchise that once stood for raunchy R-rated fun is turned into a TV movie—appearing on a computer screen near you next Friday!

Anyway, this Running Tally tabulates the pre-season magazines, most of which are terribly dated by the time they land on the newsstand and some of which, quite frankly, seemed like they were put together with no effort whatsoever (as noted in the first Running Tally, the one CAA magazine preview that was certainly worked on with equal parts passion and diligence was the Blue Ribbon Yearbook, authored by your good friend and mine Litos).

Lindy’s, for example, counts both Chaz Williams and Halil Kanacevic as returnees for Hofstra, which means either the deadline was Feb. 15 or the writer just didn’t care. I’m not sure which would be more disturbing. (Actually the most disturbing thing is that the guy still only picked Hofstra, with all those guys back, sixth)

Such inaccuracies are not limited to previews printed on dead trees (I found an online preview this week that was so riddled with factual errors I thought it had been assassinated at the Jones Beach tollbooths) but it makes me reconsider whether or not to even count the magazines in these Running Tallies. I decided to do it for another year, mostly because the sight of pre-season magazines on the newsstand still give me a little jolt that reminds me of childhood, when these things were gold.

Enough blathering out of me. Here is a link to the first Running Tally and below are the updated standings. If you come across any more previews, please send them along so I can include them in the next Running Tally. (As always, my point system mimics the cross country point system—one point for first place, two points for second place, all the way to 12 points for last place.)

1.) Old Dominion (8) 20

2.) VCU (4) 24.5

3.) George Mason (1) 33.5

4.) James Madison 59

5.) HOFSTRA 72

6.) William & Mary 87.5

7.) Northeastern 91.5

8.) Drexel 99

9.) Delaware 107

10.) Towson 121

11.) UNC Wilmington 144

12.) Georgia State 151

First place votes in parentheses.

Polls collected thus far: CAA, Brian Mull, Mark Selig, CAA Hoops “Brain Trust,” Rivals.com, Rush The Court, CAA Full Court Press, Blue Ribbon, Athlon, Sporting News, Slam, Lindy’s.

—Even people with old-fashioned deadlines hate our beloved Flying Dutchmen, who remain fifth overall after they were picked as high as fifth by Blue Ribbon (Litos knows not to anger me) and as low as seventh by Sporting News. Everyone else—those who seemed to be paying attention and those who weren’t alike—picked Hofstra sixth, which has me once again singing Motley Crue!

—ODU collected three first-place votes (Blue Ribbon, Athlon’s and Slam) to remain the overwhelming favorite to repeat as champion. The Monarchs have not been picked lower than third in any of the 13 polls.

—VCU picked up two first-place votes (Sporting News and Lindy’s) to widen its lead over George Mason. Like ODU, VCU has not been picked lower than third by anyone.

—Our good friends at Mason received a second (Athlon’s), three thirds and a fourth, which unfortunately was from Lindy’s. That marked the first time the Patriots have been picked outside the top three.

—James Madison easily hangs on to fourth despite a pair of inexplicable eighth-place votes from Sporting News and Slam. Seriously, are these writers even trying? I’m not entirely convinced the Dukes will finish in the top four—almost but not quite—but barring widespread injury they won’t finish eighth. Anyway, a second-place vote from Lindy’s helped negate the two eighths.

—William & Mary was picked eighth by three magazines but picked up a fourth (Sporting News) and a fifth (Slam) to hang on to sixth place overall.

—It would be easier to list the spots in which Northeastern HASN’T been picked. Our Boston Bias friends were picked in five different spots by the five magazines—fourth, fifth, seventh, ninth and 10th—which is appropriate since the Huskies have been picked to finish in seven different spots overall (sixth and eighth are the other ones). Alanis Morrissette should write a song about the irony of a team coached by straight-laced Bill Coen being picked to finish all over the place.

—The long lead time for magazines might be the best thing to happen this season to Drexel, which looked like a championship contender before point guard Jamie Harris was arrested for armed robbery. The Dragons moved from ninth to eighth thanks to two fifths (Athlon’s and Lindy’s), a sixth, a seventh and a 10th (notably, Blue Ribbon). The Dragons were picked seventh or higher just three times by the eight sources that had the benefit of casting votes after July.

—Delaware gives Northeastern a run for its money by being picked sixth (Blue Ribbon), seventh and 12th once apiece and 10th twice, but the spate of double-digit picks drop the Blue Hens to ninth. It’s probably a good sign, though, for our friends in Newark that they were picked 10th or lower just once by the online forecasters. The Blue Hens also have the biggest gap between highest and lowest forecast (seven spots).

—Towson is 10th overall despite having almost twice as many ninth-place votes (seven) as 10th-place votes (four). The magazines are in almost unanimous agreement about the Tigers as only Blue Ribbon (seventh) picked them higher than ninth. Every other magazine else except Slam (10th) selected Towson ninth.

—UNC-Wilmington hangs on to 11th after getting its highest vote yet, a ninth from Slam. The Seahawks got three 11ths and a 12th (Athlon’s) as well.

—Georgia State remains in the basement after three 12th-place votes and two 11th-place votes. The Panthers have been picked in the bottom two in every poll.

Email Jerry at defiantlydutch@yahoo.com or follow Defiantly Dutch at http://twitter.com/defiantlydutch.

Follow the yellow (and blue) brick road!

Oh yeah. One hundred and seventy-one days until the Flying Dutchmen wipe the smile off the beak!

So imagine Mom and Dad come to you on July 8 and tell you that they’ve heard there’s going to be a brand spanking new video game system that is like Nintendo plus Sega plus Atari, except 150 times better, and that as long as it comes out before Christmas they’re going to get it for you. You’d be looking at the calendar and wondering what to do with yourself for the next 171 days, wouldn’t you?

I mean, once you’ve gotten a glimpse of the future, it’s kind of tough to go back to that Intellivision, with its clunky controllers (I’ve got a great idea! Put the most important buttons ON THE SIDES!!) and even clunkier overlays. All the cool kids had Atari. Nobody ever wanted to hear about the awesome graphics on the Intellivision or how Mattel had the rights to NFL Football or Major League Baseball. Nobody ever come over to play Pac-Man knockoff Lock ‘N Chase or Space Invaders knockoff Space Armada. They wanted to play the so-called real things on Atari, despite graphics that looked like they were designed by an eight-year-old with absolutely no artistic skill.

Seriously, we used to have to play this crap.

Where was I? Oh yeah. We’re approximately 171 days away from the Flying Dutchmen almost surely opening the 2009-10 season at the University of Kansas. You know…Kansas. Rock Chalk Jayhawk. Likely 2009-10 preseason no. 1. 2008 national champions. Danny Manning and the Miracles. Alma mater of the dude who invented basketball.

Sure, there’s a couple qualifiers in the above graph, but athletic director Jack Hayes appeared on WRHU’s The Locker Room last night and said an agreement to play the game “…is pretty close.

“I think if you went to a lot of basketball fans and said what are the five places you’d want to see a game, Allen Fieldhouse is going to be on most people’s list,” Hayes said. “[Kansas] certainly has an unbelievable tradition of success coming off a national championship a couple years ago. This will be a test for us, but these are the kind of tests and the kind of situations that we want to put our team in.”

I know you liked opening the season against the likes of Clemson, Holy Cross, Charlotte and Florida International, but, well, they’re kinda like tube socks and slacks and polo shirts, aren’t they? Necessities, sure, but nobody ever hustles downstairs Christmas morning to rip the wrapping paper off those gifts.

But Kansas? Kansas? I’m not saying I’m bouncing off the walls in anticipation of Christmas Day—err, Nov. 15, at least if Kansas opens its season on the third Sunday of November like it did last year—but I just looked at Expedia and a round-trip flight to Kansas City from one of the New York-area airports is a little over $500. That’s a small price to pay to watch the Flying Dutchmen knock off the top-ranked team in the country! Then we’ll be no. 1! That’s how these things work, right? Unless Tom O’Connor has a vote, of course.

And really, why should Hofstra be intimidated by Kansas? So “Rock Chalk Jayhawk” rolls off the tongue and Allen Fieldhouse is one of the most legendary venues in the country. I’d rather be unique like Hofstra, which has no chants because most fans refuse to refer to the team by its “official” nickname and plays in a 10-year-old arena best known for looking exactly like the one at Delaware.

The Jayhawk ain’t all that tough. Kate and Willie could probably kick his butt.

Kansas might begin the season no. 1? Pffft. Hofstra’s probably going to be picked to finish in the top four in the CAA. You know what that means, right? A 25 percent chance of winning the post-season tournament!

Sure, the Jayhawks won it all in 2008, but there’s no Supernintendo Chalmers to save them now! And Hofstra hits its free throws! And the Flying Dutchmen won’t miss a buzzer-beater in a postseason elimination game! Wait a minute…

Danny Manning and the Miracles can’t hold a candle to Darius Burton and the…umm…err…Three Wins In Three Daysers! And without Butch van Breda Kolff, James Naismith’s invention never takes flight!!

That’s right. Bring it on, Jayhawks.

Of course, I’m just talking out of my backside, much more so than usual. I fully realize Hofstra’s best chance of winning that game probably involves the Kansas starting five being kidnapped and replaced by The Jayhawks, the Minneapolis-based alt-country band who hit it moderately big with “Waiting on the Sun” the year the Flying Dutchmen played an independent schedule (oh yeah, you didn’t see that coming, did you?). The real Jayhawks may be so good and so unstoppable next year that I’ll be curled into the fetal position somewhere in Allen Fieldhouse, sucking my thumb and begging for mercy (or, more likely, kicking a barstool at my local Applebees).

But it’ll be fun getting there. My best friend lives in Lawrence (and, ironically in that it’s not ironic at all, he grew up a Syracuse fan, which meant he was also the target of my barbs the last time Hofstra played a top 10 team) and another good friend is a Kansas grad, so we can all go at it until the two teams finally tip off.

And short of everyone on the roster deciding it likes Kansas so much it would rather play for Division II Pittsburg State than return home, the trip to Lawrence is a no-lose proposition for Hofstra. The school makes a crapload of money for heading to Kansas. The Flying Dutchmen get the experience of playing a top-tier team and do so with a group of players well-equipped for such an opponent and the possibilities that come with it. Keep the game close—or, dear God, win it outright—and it would provide an immeasurable boost for the 2009-10 team as well as the entire program.

If they lose by 35? It’s probably not going to destroy the Dutchmen’s confidence. Could we have said the same thing the previous two years?

“I’m just not sure if coming off 12-18 and losing your all-time leading scorer was the best time to go and play the defending national champions,” Hayes told WRHU. “But in this case, we have a talented group coming back and I think it’ll be a good test for us.”

The big test for the rest of us will be tempering our enthusiasm between now and the day the Flying Dutchmen channel their inner Chaminade. That happened at a Christmas tournament, by the way. The so-called real Christmas, not the one that is now only 171 days away. Are we there yet? I’m tired of my Intellivision.

Email Jerry at defiantlydutch@yahoo.com. And join the Defiantly Dutch group at Facebook today!